do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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