Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Did I show you my penis last night?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
