did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize