Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
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