wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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