I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize