I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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