I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
It was confusing and full of hummus
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
