Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
there's paper in my vomit.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize