It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize