it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Randomize