why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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