you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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