Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
