Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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