I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Sober January is a disaster.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I have tasted many bathrooms
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize