You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
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