Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
