Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
