Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
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