remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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