we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize