I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I skipped work to stalk him.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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