The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
