She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Sober January is a disaster.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
