Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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