the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.