I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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