just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize