I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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