am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
zippers are such a cool invention
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
