Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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