I'm going to jail i love you
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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