Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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