I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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