just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Let's get the cat blown out
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
