5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
