He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
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MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
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the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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