who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize