Define "chronic" masturbator.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
