fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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