And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize