I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize
