Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
