just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
He's a Shit stain on my heart
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
