Those balls look pretty dangerous.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
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