I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
honey bunches of taint.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Randomize
