Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
