Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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