we made out on top of his cat.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
