We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
