guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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