Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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